Using Narrative Therapy Techniques in Divorce Practice: Reframing Lives During Transition
By Robert Steiner MS, M.Ed, JD
Introduction
Divorce is a challenging life transition that can significantly impact a person's sense of identity and well-being. Narrative therapy, a therapeutic approach focused on understanding and reshaping personal narratives, offers valuable techniques for individuals navigating divorce. This article explores how narrative therapy techniques—externalization, deconstruction, re-authoring, and identifying unique outcomes—can help clients reframe their lives, identify key negotiation points, and find meaning during this difficult period.
1. Externalization
Technique Overview: Externalization involves separating a person’s identity from their problems, allowing them to view their issues as external challenges rather than intrinsic flaws. This perspective helps individuals understand that their problems do not define them and that they can address their behavior without altering their sense of self.
Application in Divorce Practice:
- Reframing Issues: Divorce can lead individuals to feel defined by the conflict or failure of the marriage. Externalization helps clients see the divorce process as an external event rather than a reflection of their personal worth. For example, instead of viewing the divorce as a failure of their character, clients can view it as a challenging situation that requires strategic management.
- Negotiation Focus: By externalizing issues, clients can more clearly identify and prioritize the aspects of the divorce that need negotiation, such as financial settlements or child custody arrangements. For instance, a client might externalize financial disputes as "the financial complications of the divorce" rather than a personal failing.
2. Deconstruction
Technique Overview: Deconstruction involves breaking down negative narratives into smaller, more manageable components to understand and address the underlying issues. This technique helps clients unpack and analyze the root causes of their problems.
Application in Divorce Practice:
- Understanding the Narrative: Clients often carry negative or limiting narratives about their marriage and divorce. Deconstructing these narratives helps clients understand the specific issues contributing to the divorce, such as communication problems or unmet needs. By breaking down these issues, clients can better address and negotiate them.
- Negotiation Strategy: Deconstruction enables clients to pinpoint specific areas of contention that need to be addressed in negotiations. For example, if a client feels overwhelmed by the complexity of dividing assets, deconstructing the issue into manageable parts can help them focus on negotiating specific assets or liabilities.
3. Re-authoring
Technique Overview: Re-authoring involves revisiting and revising one’s narrative to align with personal strengths, values, and goals. This technique allows clients to reshape their stories to reflect their aspirations and create a more positive outlook on their future.
Application in Divorce Practice:
- Creating a New Narrative: Divorce often involves redefining one’s identity and future. Re-authoring helps clients develop a new narrative that incorporates their strengths and values, allowing them to envision a positive future beyond the divorce. For example, a client might reframe their story from "victim of a broken marriage" to "individual embarking on a new chapter of growth and opportunity."
- Setting Goals: Re-authoring can help clients articulate and pursue their personal and family goals post-divorce. This might include setting goals for personal development, new relationships, or career aspirations. By focusing on these goals, clients can negotiate terms that support their new narrative and future plans.
4. Unique Outcomes
Technique Overview: Unique outcomes are moments or events that contradict the dominant negative narrative. Highlighting these instances helps clients recognize and build on positive aspects of their experiences.
Application in Divorce Practice:
- Identifying Strengths: During divorce, clients might struggle to see their strengths and achievements. Identifying unique outcomes helps clients acknowledge moments of resilience or positive actions they’ve taken. For instance, a client might recognize their effective co-parenting efforts or their successful management of a challenging situation during the marriage.
- Negotiation Leverage: By focusing on these unique outcomes, clients can leverage their strengths in negotiations. For example, recognizing their ability to maintain a stable environment for their children can strengthen their position in custody negotiations.
Conclusion
Narrative therapy techniques offer powerful tools for clients undergoing divorce, helping them reframe their experiences, identify key negotiation points, and carve out new meaning and identity. By employing externalization, deconstruction, re-authoring, and unique outcomes, clients can shift their perspective from one of conflict and loss to one of growth and opportunity. These techniques not only facilitate more effective negotiation but also support clients in creating a positive and empowered narrative for their future.
References
- White, M., & Epston, D. (1990). Narrative Therapy: Directions for Community Work. Norton & Company.
- Freedman, J., & Combs, G. (1996). Narrative Therapy: The Construction of Preferred Realities. Norton & Company.
- McLeod, J. (2013). An Introduction to Counseling. Open University Press.
For further information or to discuss any legal matters, please contact Attorney Robert Steiner at (205) 826-4421 or via email at robert@steinerfirm.com. Whether you have questions about this article or need personalized legal advice, he is available to assist you.
